Mental Health

In a recent episode of The Wellness Effect, host Seth Mulli chats with Giles Fourie, Director and Co-Founder of White River Manor, about the ins and outs of substance abuse recovery. Seth, a passionate wellness advocate, uses The Wellness Effect to explore holistic health and share expert advice on mental health, addiction, and overall wellness. In this conversation, Giles draws on his deep experience to share insights into effective treatment and the importance of strong support systems for long-term recovery. A must-watch for anyone looking for guidance on overcoming addiction and finding lasting change. https://youtu.be/exOKL2r4PdE?siDVlT5auCINjP08_J Seth Muli: Welcome back to The Wellness Effect. This week, we're discussing substance abuse. Remember to hit the subscribe button. With me in the studio is Giles Fourie from White River Manor. Welcome, Giles. Giles Fourie: Thank you. Seth: So, Giles, how did you get into this space, particularly substance abuse recovery? Giles: Well, I'm a recoveree myself. So, nearly 19 years on a journey-- Seth: Wow! Incredible. Giles: Yeah. I spent from the age of 17 to the age of 30 in the corporate world, from the age of 19 to 30 in full-blown addiction, and, by the time I was 30 years old, I was burnt out and, to be honest, I was nearly dead. Seth: Wow. Giles: And I reached out for help. And since I got my own freedom from addiction, I never wanted to go back into the corporate world and decided that, you know, helping other people gain the freedom that I had gained was really what I wanted to do with my life. Seth: Maybe -- could you elaborate to us what are the catalysts to an addiction? Giles: There's many facets to addiction. Every person is different. But, I think, in essence, the catalyst to addiction on people that are trying to escape their current circumstances, so whether it be a lack of self‑worth, a feeling of depression, anxiety-- you know, there's a lot of reasons why people want to escape. But I think the fundamental is someone that is trying to get rid of the way that they feel, so they're using a substance, or a process addiction, or whatever it might be as a momentary relief from the way that they feel. So, you know, every single person-- and every single person's experience in-- experiences in life are different, but it's how they perceive those experiences and what has happened to them in life that either makes them want to escape the way that they feel, you know, or deal with the problems that they have. So, it's almost like a fight or flight response, if you’d like to call it that. Seth: Absolutely, absolutely. You mentioned quite a bit about these catalysts, maybe self-worth and wanting to escape. Let's say you recognize someone who's on that journey towards substance abuse. How do you approach them to state—almost, how do you help them? Giles: Well, I think the first thing and the most important thing for me is that you should always try and seek professional help. Seth: Okay. Giles: I think, often, what I've seen, in the last 19 years in the industry, is when family members try to step in, you know, they sort of run into it head first and sometimes push the person further away from wanting treatment. Seth: Absolutely. Giles: So, finding a professional, a registered therapist, a social worker, or using the support structures that exist, you know, in the area would be their first port of call. I think gaining a deeper understanding from those people about addiction and about the reasons why the person might be in addiction would be the most important first steps to getting a person into successful treatment. Seth: I want to pause on that. In relation to the previous question, you mentioned that the catalysts are self‑worth, almost wanting to escape. How do you, as an individual, recognize that maybe there's some things you haven't dealt with and that you need help? Like, what are the small triggers that you can notice in yourself? Like, maybe I'm-- you know, putting it to the side but actually I need help? Giles: Yeah. I mean, I think a lot of people deal with anxiety— Seth: Yes. Giles: —without even recognizing it. You know, a lot of people drink alcohol, for example, just to be socially accepted— Seth: Yes. Giles: —so that they can take the edge off. Seth: Correct. Giles: And I think that those are sort of the precursors and the sort of markers that someone needs to look at is “Am I drinking to try and feel better? Am I drinking to be accepted? Am I drinking because I can't handle, you know, my circumstances right now?” So, I think that those are the sort of things that people need to try and look inward— Seth: Yeah. Giles: —and try to identify in order to be able to start their own process. Seth: It's important for our viewers to note that there are small markers that you can identify. But maybe let's talk about what is recovery. Giles: Well, again, that's a very-- a very broad statement – recovery, you know. But I think that recovery, first of all, is about connection because if there's one thing that addiction is, it's about disconnecting from oneself. Seth: Wow. Giles: It's about trying to escape the way that you feel. So, recovery is about reconnecting with who you are and trying to go on this journey because it is a journey— there is no destination, to find out who you really are. It's a difficult journey, you know, one of introspection where you have to look inward and acknowledge your weaknesses and acknowledge your shortcomings, is never easy. But I think those— you know, those are the sort of beginning steps of someone that goes through a process of recovery that needs to identify within themselves, you know, what is it that needs to change. And whether someone is going on a spiritual journey in recovery or not, it's still about connection with oneself. You know, if you go on a spiritual journey of recovery, it's connecting with your higher power. But, again, that will still bring you back to a closer connection with self. And it's being able to live with yourself and accept yourself. I think those are, you know, the big criteria that people need to work towards because, you know, a lot of people don't accept who they are and don't accept the weaknesses that they've got, and they try to mask and hide those things. So, I think a part of recovery is really, you know, being open, being honest, being vulnerable, and allowing, you know, your weaknesses to be shown, but, in doing so, you allow people in to help you, you know, through your process. Seth: That's really powerful. I love that you mentioned it’s really about connecting either to a higher power or to oneself. What was that for you in your recovery journey? Giles: Well, it was connecting to a higher power. You know, for me, I think my relationship with God is what has restored my self‑worth. It has given me my identity. And, you know, my process of going through dealing with my childhood traumas and, you know, the things that had brought me to addiction, you know, I think that those were only really possible with God in my life. Seth: And what determines if someone will be successful in recovery or if they won't be— or if they'll be unsuccessful in the recovery process? Giles: So, I think, in my opinion, that someone that is going to go on a successful recovery journey is someone who's not willing to compromise. I see that, you know, people that are willing to compromise in their process, and compromise in the places that they go to, and compromise with the friends that they have, often are the people that, you know, will relapse and go back into addiction - people that are prepared to take a step right back out of the life that they've been living, and to really reassess their lives and what is important and to stick to that. I think that that's one element. But I think-- you know, I think anyone who's prepared to continue on their process of recovery. So, it's not just about, you know, someone that might come to White River Manor is there for a month, or two months, or whatever it might be, but it's someone who's prepared to get into a program for the rest of their recovery and the rest of their journey that will generally be successful, you know, whether that be in NA, AA, the 12‑step meetings, or someone who finds a therapist, you know, that is able to help them walk the rest of their recovery process out. Seth: I like how you started this conversation saying that you've been on a 19-year journey of recovery. Do you view recovery as this lifelong process rather than it being, you know, a short 12-week process in a program? Giles: You know, I think— I do believe that I've been set free from addiction, but that doesn't mean that I'm not in recovery, you know. It doesn't mean that I am able to compromise on, you know, the places that I go to and the friends that I have. I do believe it's a journey. I don't believe that you know, someone that has been recovered for 30 years is able to take, you know, a sip of alcohol, you know, because, you know, that would put them in a compromising position-- Seth: Correct. Giles: —even though they've been out of it for so long. Seth: Yeah. Giles: So, it's a decision that you have to make every single day, you know, but I do believe that you can be set free from it. Seth: Amazing. You mentioned White River Manor in the discussion that we’re having. What forms of recovery do you support those who are going through some level of addiction? Giles: Well, at White River Manor, we try to work with the person. So, we don't have a set structure, and we don't try to wrap a program around somebody. We try to get to know who the person is and build a program that suits them. So, some people like the NA process, or the AA process, or the 12‑step process and other people don't. So, for us, it's really about trying to get to know the person, identify, you know, what they need to work on, what their recovery goals are, and build a program around them and a support structure around them, and then walk them through the process. Seth: You mentioned community. How important is community on a recovery journey? Giles: Community is essential, in my opinion. I think that— I think that that's one of the reasons why the— you know, the 12-step model and the NA is so successful because you surround yourself with like-minded people— people that want recovery that are fighting every single day. And I think it's also an opportunity to share your burdens with other people. Even though they might not be able to help, I think being able to talk about it in a community of people that are supportive is essential. Seth: Yeah. I think a community where there isn't any judgment is almost individuals who are on a similar path towards recovery. Giles: Exactly. I think that that's— that's another— that’s a key as well that you touch on is judgment and the stigma— Seth: Yes. Giles: —that is around, you know, addiction. And I think that that's something that, you know, we still need to work hard on trying to oppose, you know, that generally, people don't get into addiction because they want to be there. They don't end up on the streets or wherever it is because that's what they like. It's because the place that they're in, within themselves, is so bad that they would rather run from that, you know, than be there. So, yeah. Seth: And maybe, as we close the conversation, two questions I'd love to pose to you is the first one is for someone who's watching this and they have someone who they know is struggling with addiction, what piece of advice would you give them? The second being an individual who's watching this and realizes some of the points you've mentioned is actually struggling with an addiction that they're maybe not aware of but this conversation has maybe enlightened them, what advice would you give them? Giles: So, I think, for any family member that's identified, whether it's their child or their spouse that needs help, I think, like I said, it's to approach a professional that can really help them because I think that those interventions are critical and sometimes you only have one bite at the apple to really get the buy‑in from the person that's in addiction that needs the help. And I think a trained professional is the best person to facilitate that. You know, the other— the other question about someone who's seeing this that really needs help, you know, I think that there's a lot of avenues that someone can take in order to seek help. You know, there's a lot of facilities that are out there. There are a lot of rehabs that are in‑patient/outpatient. But I think the first step would be to contact someone that they trust and, you know, share their story with that person and allow them to guide them to the best possible place for their own therapy. Seth: I know I said the last question, but I have another one. We're talking about wellness, specifically for organizational leaders who are leading businesses or leading large enterprises, what do business leaders do when they notice, in their organization, there are people who struggle with addiction— addictions? What level of support can they provide as organizations? Giles: Well, I think, the first intervention, I think, would be to have the HR department reach out to the individual. I think that, you know, there's a lot of companies that have got great structures within themselves. Seth: Sure. Giles: But I think that corporate companies need to, more often, seek the help of professionals from outside to come in to facilitate, you know, educational talks. And I think that that also helps to destigmatize it and allow the employees to come forward and acknowledge the issues that they've got. So, I think, you know, the first step of companies really is to show the support to their staff, you know, because I think, at the end of the day, if they can get their staff helped, they're going to have more productive staff and, you know, it's going to have a better return for them and the company. We deal with many corporate companies that do that and that have fantastic support structures within them. But I think South Africa needs a lot more of that. Seth: I like that. It's to bring professional services or professionals to come into the organization to help facilitate those conversations because I think, at times, as organizations, we want to try and resolve these, but we do need to seek professional advice. Giles: Yeah. Again, I think that it's important that someone who's trained in the field is the person that is facilitating a conversation like that because they're able to be there in a non‑judgmental manner, in a very supportive manner, but in an educated manner as well, to try and draw, you know, the person out of the issues that they've got and to get them the help they need. Seth: So, Giles, you mentioned, you know, community being essential in this recovery journey. How do people stay connected in the community as they, you know, progress in their recovery journey? Giles: Well, I think— I mean, you know, if you have a look at the 12‑step model, step 12 is giving back. So, I think that that's an important part about staying within the community is, you know, you work your own process to a point where you have dealt with the majority of the things that you need to within your own recovery and then you have the opportunity to give back to others. And I think that that helps the cycle continue. So, you have people coming in that are desperate, that are lost, that are confused, and, you know, you have people that have been through the same process that are there to really support them, you know, and to hold them, and to take them through the most difficult times. And I think once that person has gone through that process, they would-- they want to reciprocate, similar to, you know, my own story. Seth: Yeah. So, as they receive help, it's to almost reciprocate that help they've received with others. Giles: Yeah. To give back what you've been given, I think, is probably one of the most gratifying experiences, you know, one can have. Seth: Giles, thank you so much for explaining the recovery process and sharing your own journey. It's been enlightening to me, and I know it will be for our audience. Giles: It's a pleasure. It's been great being here and, yeah, to have the opportunity to share and to, hopefully, reach people out there that need help. Seth: Amazing. Remember to subscribe so you don't miss out. I'll see you next time on The Wellness Effect.